DREAMING ABOUT SKIING… AFTER WINNING MY HEAVIEST BATTLE EVER!
Season 2013/2014, a long-cherished dream came true: I went to Austria for a whole season to ski! At the time, I had a job as a high school teacher in physical education, but I was given the opportunity to take unpaid leave that season. I did have a few physical complaints, but I always thought I just had a heavy workload and busy and fun life. In Flachau, however, I discovered that the complaints remained, while skiing gave me the ultimate freedom and I no longer had a heavy workload.
Back in the Netherlands, I went to see the doctor and immediately rolled into the medical whirlwind. It became a long, complicated, and confusing process. I had a rare variant of a rare disease and treatment was difficult. I was very ill and felt completely lost. I was looking for grip and control and got stuck in calorie tracking. I fell into the vicious circle of an eating disorder and developed anorexia nervosa. I soon realized that I needed help with the problems with food, but the boat was kept off everywhere because I was also physically ill and that was quite a complicated disease. After a few years (!!) I finally found an institution that was willing to help me. Unfortunately, it was already so far that an internal hospitalizing was necessary. I was admitted to the clinic in Helmond for 14 weeks in October 2019. There they could physically monitor me and treat me for the eating disorder as well.
After 14 weeks I moved on to the 5-day day treatment. Then you just sleep at home, but you are there during the day during the week. I fought hard and the thing that has always kept me going is the fact that every day was a new day and that I wanted to ski again! The feeling of freedom, happiness, and love that I feel when skiing a great piste kept me going almost literally. I have had deep lows, also during the physical illness. Whenever it went bad, I looked forward to the next day, because then the day started again, the sun would rise again. The new round, new opportunities!
I am now on my way to the end of the 5-day treatment. I am no longer underweight and can therefore start skiing again. The idea that I can be on the slopes gives a great motivation boost. By coincidence, I came across Snowplanners and I sent Alex an email. He responded immediately and suddenly I was allowed to be part of a great organization. I am so looking forward to my first time on my skis again and whether it is in a hall in the Netherlands, or in one of the ski areas, does not even matter that much to me for the first time. I want, I can, I may and I will!